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The Daily Beast has created a "Marry, Screw, Kill" game out of some of the more notable alleged lovers, practically patting Lohan on the back.
In reference to Fifty Shades of Grey star Jamie Dornan's presence on the list, Amy Zimmerman writes, "Because the hands-down coolest thing about being Lindsay Lohan is that you get to casually have sex with the guy from Fifty Shades of Grey ... Eh, been there, done that.'" VICE serves up some high fives for Lohan, pointing out the benefit of Adam Levine's "FUCKING ABS" and noting that pretty much anyone would have sex with Garrett Hedlund: " if you’re ever given the chance to have sex with someone who is famous for being really, really good-looking, you have to take that shot." Even the Mirror, a UK tabloid that's not exactly the pinnacle of feminist integrity, promotes Lohan's conquests as a victory: "...
But, seeing the narrative that a famous scandal-ridden woman wrote out 36 names and claimed they were all her past lovers without it raising cry-for-help alarm bells all over the Internet is rather telling.
We say that women should be allowed to be sexually dominant and vocal about their sex lives, but when Miley Cyrus does it, the whole world stops.
And when Beyonce does it, someone insists she'll incite a rash of teenage pregnancies.
The narrative seems to be that she's a sexually liberated young woman living in a city full of hot men...
and that we really hope this list is real because holy shit, does it seem too good to be true.
This assertion, of course, discounts teenagers on Twitter, who use the word "slut" in judgment every other second, and the occasional despicable dude-bro quips along the lines of "Making a sex list sounds like something a sophomore in high school would make before smoking a cigarette in the bathroom.